A Storm In Any Port
February 25th, 2010 - By j guevara
A Storm In Any Port
It’s the looniest ship I ever sailed
What’d I expect to find
Once I pulled anchor
Left firm shore behind…
Sailing the ocean is scary
Which is why ‘Offshore’ has been defined:
Out of:
(a) Sight of land
(b) Your mind
Especially with no compass, charts or sextant
One prop had a broken screw
And, to make matters worse, could one imagine
This ship had no crew
It did have many strange gizmos
Plus the damnedest contraptions
And who in maritime ever heard
Of a ship with two captains…
It’s easy to fantasize
Though hard to keep afloat
In spite of romantic visions
It’s not the ‘Love Boat’
Her ballast was not enough
To keep her right adrift
So when she took a starboard wave
She had a mean port list
In shallow straight she’s treacherous
Doesn’t handle with ease
You’d do better maneuvering
The Exxon Valdez
In a storm, I’d damn the torpedoes
Throttle full speed ahead
But the other captain demanded
Another course instead
I explained to this Captain Bligh
We’re headin’ for disaster
There’s never been a ship
That can serve two masters
But we both had equal experience
When it came to this sea
So we couldn’t agree
What makes you El Capitàn
Ahead of me…
However, the more we’d navigate
The more we’d cooperate
And appreciate
Aye, aye, mate
In certain storms, I found
The other captain usually knew
The best way to get around
By the same token
I’m the one best at fixing
Anything that’s broken
I’m also program director
For games, contests and more
I always win, never lose,
…’cause I also keep the score
The other captain is gifted in the galley
Which any fool could see
When I make raviolis
It’s gourmet Chef Boyardee
It took some time to figure
What each of us knows
Although we’re still working it out
And stepping on each others toes
We both find it difficult
A source of constant frustration
To come to a conclusion
What exactly is our destination…
To me it sounded terrific
Why not sail the South Pacific…
But the other captain insists on knowing
Which islands in specific…
We do agree however,
No difference near or far
S’long as we lay on deck at night
And count each falling star
There’re still plenty of storms to maneuver
No weather’s always fair
And this ship keeps me busy
In constant need of repair
Aye, it’s hard work, but worth it
So when my tour of duty was done
I had to admit rough times
Were far outweighed by fun
I know I’m probably out of my mind
But I re-enlisted for a permanent trip
On this rickety old boat
Someone aptly named
The HMS ‘Relation’ ship
This entry was posted on Thursday, February 25th, 2010 at 10:55 pm and is filed under Blog. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
Responses
j guevara
February 25th
I recently ran into another global citizen, Laura Rittenhouse, author of ‘Starting Over’ http://www.laurarittenhouse.com/
Laura, a Yank married to an Aussie, are looking to buy a yacht someday and sail the world. She noticed in my bio, ‘About j’, that I had once sailed and asked me about it. I thought the easiest way to reply would be to post this excerpt from my poetry book ‘Vice Verses: a book of rhymin’ crime’.
This pretty much sums it up, Laura. It was the best of times. It was the worst of times. But if not for that ‘black hole’ in the water and it’s penchant for sucking in cash, I’d be out there living the dickens of an adventure
Ed
February 26th
Great piece KAWF; well done.
Nice twist at the end.
But if you ever catch me out on the great big blue without 4000 tons underneath me;
call the shrinks
Walt Long
February 26th
As a veteran of small albacore fishers (as Richard Burns), various U. S. Navy behemoths, and three marriages – let me tell you that the journey isn’t made easy by survival, but by cooperation.
Laura Rittenhouse
February 26th
j, I won’t thank you for posting this poem. I’m already not convinced sailing into the sunset (and the next one, and the next one, and …) is something I have the guts for. Though maybe if I can handle the other kind of “ship” the sailing sort shouldn’t put me off.
William Cheek
February 26th
But the other captain insists on knowing
Which islands in specific…
Ha. I know that person. Not typically on her side in the matter, either.
A thought on offshoring « MissUnderstood
March 6th
[...] from A Storm In Any Port, by j [...]
Panic Attack
March 7th
lol some of the remarks bloggers post are a bit spacey, every so often i really think whether they really go through the pieces of content and threads before making a comment or whether they only gloss over the blog post title and write the first opinion that jumps into their brain. anyway, it really is useful to browse smart commentary occasionally in contrast to exactly the same, old opinion which i usually notice on the internet.
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